B.U.S.Y

Busy, that is a word used by so many. Busy, that is what parents are. Busy, that is how we keep kids out of trouble. Busy. Busy. Crazy Busy. It seems we, in general, are so busy any more. Too busy to stop over for a cup of tea or coffee and chat. Too busy to go visit grandparents. Too busy for a lazy afternoon. Too Busy.

I have been there, so busy I wonder if I will make it through the week. I am selfish, too, though. I do not like being too busy to enjoy dinner as a family. I enjoy conversations with my family. I love to take a walk or bike ride together. Geocaching, what a simple, inexpensive time to explore the outdoors. Cooking real, whole, nutritious food. So many simple things, we cannot enjoy when we are ‘crazy busy’

I have been thinking about this lately, felt challenged by God to say, what can I do to slow the pace? Does my pace create peace in my home? Can I welcome visitors, expected or unexpected? I do, within the depths of my heart, believe in fellowship with one another, is something we are called to do. But, that is another topic.

Busy….what does the Word of God have to say about busy? Of course, those who have been around the Church and teachings for more than a month know about Mary and Martha. Jesus came to their home. Martha was all flustered with the stuff to do, such as food, serving, etc, yet Mary was listening, investing her time in being with Jesus. Martha had a melt down because her sister was not helping with the preparations, and she was scolded by Jesus, who explained Mary was focused on that which is important, Jesus. That which is eternal.

As parents how does that help us? We just know that if our children are not involved in a sport, or two, every season, we are not helping them to get ahead. If they are not in dance, drama, music, youth group, AWANAS, Scouts, etc, we are robbing them. We are made to feel guilty for keeping the out of stuff, we are reminded how important it is for our kids to be in debate, so they can learn to get ahead in the corporate world. It is expected, it is normal, it is ‘life with kids’ to have something every night of the week, sometimes even a few things on the same night, mom and dad play tag team driving kids from one activity to another, teaming with other parents to get kids where they need to be. Many sports have games on Sunday, so Church is missed, “but it is just for six weeks” (What is the message, what is more important?)

It is what we have come to accept as normal, but is it what is right in the eyes of God?

Look at this passage from Haggai 1:5-9 ESV

Now, therefore, thus says the Lord of hosts: Consider your ways. You have sown much, and harvested little. You eat, but you never have enough; you drink, but you never have your fill. You clothe yourselves, but no one is warm. And he who earns wages does so to put them into a bag with holes. “Thus says the Lord of hosts: Consider your ways. Go up to the hills and bring wood and build the house, that I may take pleasure in it and that I may be glorified, says the Lord. You looked for much, and behold, it came to little. And when you brought it home, I blew it away. Why? declares the Lord of hosts. Because of my house that lies in ruins, while each of you busies himself with his own house.

When we are so busy running kids, are we sowing into them? Are we remembering our first and most important ministry, the one hand picked by God? Are we able to take time to enjoy His creation? His art work? Are we able to enjoy dinner together as a family?

Last fall one of my sons played soccer, practice was the same night as Boy Scouts. I had made the comment, I don’t know if we will make it or how I will pull it off. A friend told me, you just get used to it, the driving, the going, the rushing, after a couple weeks, you just get used to it. She is a friend who has children involved in multiple activities at all times, she is used to it. Soccer season came, and went, and we survived. We went as a family to games, he and I did not always make it back to Scouts. We did it, but it was not without sacrifice. We did not have time to slow down to clean house, get decent meals cooked, or just enjoy this farm which God has blessed us with. Hmmm….

Sports are a great part of life for those who enjoy them, so let’s not get sidetracked on a topic not being brought up, please.

Busy…busy…When we are so busy, are we able to build up the house of the Lord? Busy.

Our family has chosen another path, one that does not keep us so busy. Yes, we have plenty of activities, yes, we have things we do, but we elect to slow down, to know our kids will be ok if they are not in music, or drama, or sports, if they do not do every camp. We chose to say no to stuff that can be good. We chose to have family first, so that means extra camps, even Church ones are not attended, we chose to have time together so that means activities are chosen carefully.

Recently, during a discussion about being busy, somebody told me the acronym for busy: Being Under Satans Yoke.

Ouch, that is true, when we are so busy, satan has us just where he wants us…….too busy to seek first the kingdom of God.

Are you b.u.s.y.?

Homeschooling and time

We are a homeschool family. Our children at educated at home. We are not ashamed of that, we share that with anybody who asks where our children attend school. We are active in our Church. We are active in our community. We are involved with our children’s extra curricula activities. We stay busy. Interesting we are not a unique homeschool family, we have lived in several areas, and have many, many friends who homeschool, and they are all pretty much like us, involved in growing children into young men and women ready to stand firm for Christ and able to be productive members of the community…..and beyond. So, why is it that people so often want us to volunteer for many extra projects? Why do people think we have so much extra time? Why do people think we need help entertaining our children?

I was slightly offended by comments made to me over the last couple of weeks. Comments such as: just don’t do school, take a break, let dad teach, thought you needed something to keep your kids busy, why can’t you have ladies coffee each week, can’t you just do school during the evening, don’t you want a break from the kids, how can you stand to be with your kids all day, if I were home all day I would go crazy but my house would be clean. After the last comment that was made to me, I had a change of heart, I really think people who have never homeschooled, nor spent much time with a homeschooling family understand the lifestyle of homeschoolers. That is what homeschooling is, it is a lifestyle, not just school at home.

Homeschooling in America has grown tremendously in the last decade, each homeschool family has their own ‘flavor’ as you continue to read this, please do not think about that one person you know/knew who did or did not, think about the many homeschool families, some within your extended family, and try to understand, maybe even walk in their shoes a bit.

We chose to homeschool our children after much prayer, discussion, and watching other homeschooling families. It was evident keeping our children at home was the right choice for our family. We do not think we are creating the next Einstein, Mother Teresa, or likewise, we are enjoying the very short time we have with our children. We relish the freedom we have to disciple our children to become more like Christ. We enjoy reading books together, learning and discovering history as a group, we love creating meals, and eating them as a family. We do not necessarily love writing paragraphs, checking grammar, or trying to understand algebra, but we do it because we have chosen this life style. Our mornings are filled with learning new or reviewing yesterday’s new things, we must spend time in the mornings as our afternoon or evenings are filled with other fun stuff.

Homeschool children are allowed to participate in sports, scouts, 4h, music, art, and foreign language lessons. Homeschool families enjoy serving others, when they have time. Homeschoolers are involved in Church, even on a day besides Sunday! Our children are involved in Scouts, sports, 4h, language, mission projects, service to others, and encouraging other homeschool families, not to mention Church during the week that makes for a full week. Our family enjoys dinner, together, as often as possible, and with other homeschooling families or friends. Proverbs mentions a good friend being better than a faraway brother, which is what other homeschool families are, our family.

As a mom, I am honored and thankful that I can legally and freely homeschool my children. I love to spend time with them. I love to listen to them. I love to watch them grow, although they are growing so very fast. My fun is when we are altogether as a family. My break is when we head out to the woods together. My time with them at home is limited, I do not want to find ways to hurry it along; I do not want to find ways to be away from them. I do not spend all day at home, I do not have a clean house most days (your first visit to my house will find it looking clean) I do not spend time arguing with my teen. I do not need help keeping them busy. I do allow for free time where the kids can p.l.a.y. Time for them to just be, that is good, to be. We do not have a school that looks like public school, and that is ok, in fact freeing. Why would I want to miss out of what we are learning so dad can teach and I can hang out? I will have plenty of time in a few very short years to have ladies tea each week, where I can take the day to play whenever the invite comes, I will have a clean house, then, maybe…..

I am not defending or explaining who I am, but rather want each person who knows or knows of a homeschool family to take a minute to understand what their lifestyle is all about.